Response to Walzer - Brooke Dinsmore

I think Walzer’s article is very important and gives us a much clearer image of the division of labor within marriages. While there is a lot of discussion of how housework is distributed unequally, this article shows it is not just a matter of time but emotional and mental energy and that ultimately women are devoting far more of it to the home than men. It is clearly visible here that having children is much more strenuous for women than men. I read an article in another sociology class that showed this pattern of women taking on the “invisible work” of managing and worrying is not just something that happens when children are infants but throughout the lifetime of a family. The question that arises is what does this mean for women, men and families? For women I think it shows most clearly why the struggle to have a family and a career is still so relevant. No matter how much time men put in, women are still the ones taking on the true responsibility for the day to day life of the family. As Walzer goes into this is most certainly the result of socialization. Women are taught to assume this burden, to want this burden and men are not.

Throughout this reading I also couldn’t help but think of how much family life could improve for everyone if men engaged in emotional and mental work of parenting as well. The picture of fatherhood that emerges here is just about going through the motions, putting in the time and the physical labor. While these men certainly love their children, they are taught that the way they should express their love is by directing their energies away from the home. What if fathers devoted the same mental and emotional energy to parenting as mothers are taught too? Children would have two parents that were fully involved in their lives and the family would most certainly be a more efficient system. Mothers could truly take a break, could relax from their worries because their husbands could be fully trusted. Women would be enabled to devote more mental and emotional energy to their own selves, to be much healthier human beings, which in turn would be better for their children. And children would most certainly from fuller bonds with their fathers. We should move away from the current definitions of motherhood and fatherhood not just because they hurt women but because they hurt everyone.