One thing I found to be interesting
from the reading is the notion that boys are girls are from different
world or rather that boys are from Mars and women are from Venus. The
reading spends so much time differing between the two genders that
they don't realize that the sexes aren’t different they are just
brought up differently by society. The idea that “boys will be
boys” comes from society. Society wants “boys to be boys”; they
don't want boys to be girly or sissy's. “Anything tender, anything
compassionate, or too artistic is labeled gay”...”The homophobia
of boys in the 11, 12, 13 range is growing stronger than the force of
gravity” (Bordo, 240). I think men who are homophobic realize that
gay men or nerds represent something that society said they couldn't
be or someone that they wanted to be in terms of being girly or
showing emotion but they were raised to be “the jock” or the type
of “guy who always gets the girl”. The think homophobia is
internalized jealously.
Another thing that stuck out to me was
the notion that boys are equitable to animals or beasts. Boys have a
lot of pressure on them to be what society says they should be. In
term's of boys raping women and fighting other men I think that this
is what is expected of them and they act out these actions because of
it. Men have self control some just don't choose to act upon it. I
never understood why black men were seen as more dangerous than any
other race of men. I feel that black men or men of color prove their
masculinity in how tough or respected they are because most are poor
unlike white men who depend on money for their respect. I think
society has created these notions that men have to be respected in
some way but I disregard it. This problem of a men having respect or
not being girly is a problem that can be solved if society changes
their views on masculinity.
Lastly testosterone is another point
that interest me. I do believe that testosterone has an affect on a
male's body. Speaking as a trans man and someone who as been on T for
almost 2 months I can say that I have become more aggressive, I have
no tact, and my sex drive has risen. However I don't think that's a
good enough reason to act douche to other people but sometimes it
happens. I never experienced any of those thing prior to starting T.
Comment by Emily Hunter: I agree with Jae in that men and women should not be divided into two separate categories or made to be from different planets. The differences that we see in actions and in mannerisms are socially constructed. I understand that biologically there will be differences (to some degree), but these differences do not mean that we are not all humans. I like to believe that if both men and women had the opportunity to decide whether men should act like a beast, neither gender would pick such a violent and emotionless male ideal.
ReplyDeleteI also agree with Jae’s point that to some extend society expects men to rape or be physically abusive. I was taken aback by the fact that the Glen Ridge rapists were never even placed in jail, while a girl who got intoxicated once was punished more severely. Not only is this double standard a gender issue, it is also a human issue. Because men are pressured by society to be aggressive do they feel no remorse for abusing or raping another human being? Do those punishing the boys feel no compassion for the girl who was sexually abused by these boys? At some point we need to put gender issues aside and realize the physical and mental damage that is being done to both women and men because of the masculine “Beast” ideal.
Lastly, I think Jae has a very unique take on the testosterone issue. It would be interesting for researchers to do a study that examined how testosterone injections change the actions of the recipient over time. A study such as this could lead to greater insight into the role testosterone levels play in male actions.
Michael Murgo
ReplyDelete"I think men who are homophobic realize that gay men or nerds represent something that society said they couldn't be or someone that they wanted to be in terms of being girly or showing emotion but they were raised to be “the jock” or the type of 'guy who always gets the girl'. The think homophobia is internalized jealously."
I think this is a very deep theory, Jae. I never really thought that guys would be jealous of the people from whom they try so hard to be different. It makes sense, though. The "manly" guys conform to society's ideals of what it means to be a man, while the "different" guys (as you said in your example, gays and nerds) are following their own desires of identity rather than following the social script laid out for everyone. The manly guys may be jealous of the different guys' bravery to do what they want to do and to live their lives without giving heed to the masculine ideal. They wish they could be like the people they make fun of, in these cases. I know someone who, in 6th grade, was a complete homophobe. Now, he is homosexual. He was hateful toward gays because he was jealous of their ability to be themselves.
Emily, I had the exact same thought as you when reading about Glen Ridge. While society shapes people's principles and perceptions of self to an extent, you have to wonder whether humans don't also possess some inherent sense of morality and human compassion. How else might you account for NFL players who are phenomenal philanthropists and faithful husbands (I promise they do exist)? Which brings me to another point- I wonder whether an inordinate amount of responsibility is placed on sports for men's heightened aggressive proclivities. After all, sports have rules. You can't just run around the football field attacking other players on a whim. Players must be restrained- only being physical at the appropriate times and in the appropriate manner. If this restraint is shown on the field, then why are we convinced it can't also be shown off the field?
ReplyDeleteI like the comment you made regarding homophobia and how it is somewhat like an inherent jealousy trait Jae. From the observations I have made since childhood, homophobia is exactly what you describe here. Some people say it has to do with a fear of homosexuality but I think that is just a part of it. Most gay men do act upon there feelings openly and are comfortable displaying their "feminine" qualities. Of course they frown upon for doing so but it's mostly by men who have been raised and told not to.
ReplyDeleteMolly Bienstock
DeleteThis is such an interesting point about homophobia, Jae, and Garrett and Mike made some really intuitive observations about this theory. Could it also be that boys who are raised by homophobic or overly-masculine-obsessed parents envy the boys that take their own path because they also want to explore their bodies in a new sexual manner? It is much easier for women to be openly gay and show public signs of affection than it is for men. It seems society allows women to explore their bodies sexually with other women but that is surely not the case for men. I am sure there are men who have thought about being with other men, but have been entirely too nervous to ever bring it up. My girlfriends and I are always talking about how hot women are, but you would never hear a group of guys discussing a really attractive dude. Well, maybe some.